Bitchin’

It’s February 2nd and I guess Mother Nature is going to give me my monthly reminder that I’m a woman and this may be TMI for some of you “readers,” but I am going to bitch a lot right now. And you know what, it’s not my fault. It’s the other person’s fault—actually it’s everyone’s fault. Everyone is ridiculous. I am not ridiculous, everyone around me is ridiculous, even the pet that I don’t own is freaking ridiculous and inconsiderate, insensitive, and everything else that is the opposite of nice, kind, and thoughtful.

I don’t know why people talk/text/call me when they don’t even know how to be PEOPLE, they don’t even know how to act like A HUMAN BEING. Further, they still have the audacity to attempt to hold a civilized conversation with me when they probably know that I am really annoyed at them and if it’s not them, I’m probably pissed off at someone else.

SO WHY!? Why do you wanna talk to me and make yourself pretend that you’re making me feel better!? You’re probably the reason I’m pissed off right now. You’re probably the reason WHY White Toberlone isn’t regularly available in the United States, because YOU probably don’t like white chocolate, and I’m the minority. You’re the reason why I’m pretty much sitting here, bitchin’, instead of writing creative fiction, at 3am. Maybe if you did things differently, chewed differently, talked differently, spoke to me differently, then maybe I wouldn’t be so pissed off. I know no one is in charge of my happiness, but you know what people, sometimes it’s nice, sometimes it’s REALLY FUCKING SWEET if people were nice to you when you weren’t feeling so nice, because guess what, not feeling nice all the goddamn time is a human emotion. But, of course, only HUMANS know about human emotions, and I don’t live around humans—I live around mofos.

SIGH….well, this is nothing a few episodes of The Office can’t solve..

SUCK IT. SUCK A TOOTSIE ROLL THAT WAS RUBBED ON THE TOILET SEAT OF AN NYC BATHROOM, YOU JERK.

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