Categories
updates

I Bought My Own Domain!

I’ve been attempting to write something meaningful, enlightening, and exciting tonight. However, I don’t think I can come up with much. But, I do have news! I finally bought into WordPress’ tempting little blurbs on purchasing your domain for just $18/year (it’s really around $26, if you add some security measures). I didn’t think I should buy my own domain since I don’t blog much … didn’t feel like I deserved it. And I also felt like I needed a “cooler” name. It seems like I’m never going to come up with a better name. But, I still did it and YAY! I feel super, duper special. 

Categories
365 Days of Writing Prompts

One of My Favorite Quotes

“I became insane, with long intervals of horrible sanity.”

I’m trying out The Daily Post‘s 365 Days of Writing Prompts for 2014, and although I’m starting 10 days late (as well as using Day 4’s prompt for today), I’m still going to try it out. January 4’s prompt is called “Quote Me,” and asks: Do you have a favorite quote that you return to again and again? What is it, and why does it move you?

Categories
Life

Recommended: “13 Things Mentally Strong People Avoid”

Thank you, Forbes.com. Once again, you’ve delivered a quick, insightful article that has managed to influence my day and my way of thinking. And most importantly, thank you Ms. Cheryl Conner, for compiling a list you found interesting on your own, to be read by the masses.

This is a must-read for the beginning of the new year. It discusses Mentally Strong People: 13 Things They Avoid.

Enjoy,
N

Categories
musings

Sweater Weather — The Neighbourhood

Once again, I have discovered a song a little after the fact. But, it’s never too late to discover good music. The song has got some weird, hipster lyrics and a cool vibe to it, but aside from a great beat, I really like how it goes from an upbeat, fast song to ending in a slow, mellow tone. Makes sense with our emotions.

Categories
Life personal confessions trying new things

That Cliché Resolutions List

Happy New Year, friends! I’ve decided that this year, I’m actually going to make a real resolutions list. I’ve never done one of these legit resolutions before, where I want to actually work on something on myself consistently. From what I can recall, I found resolutions rather silly — I usually just expected things to change, if they were meant to, year by year. Of course, there will always be certain things that you don’t have control over in your life, but most things in your life are. We don’t realize how much control we have over our lives. Most of us let the people around us control us, let circumstances influence our decisions, our moods, our behaviors.

2013 was one of the most mixed years of my life, for the lack of a better word. It was extremely hard, disappointing, painful, devastating, yet exciting, full of wisdom, love, and happiness. I lost very close people to my heart, friendships and relationships changed drastically, I got my first official job post-college, made new friendships, and got my feet a little wet in the real world. Obviously, there’s so much left for me to discover and know, but 2013 was a year that has begun to carve me into the kind of person I’m probably going to be in the next 5 years. The choice is mine, to stay in the dark places I was in last year, or hold on to the light I found. I’ve realized, I’m going to hold on to the light I found; and those of you who are having troubles (who isn’t, really?), there must have been some moments of light in 2013 —the choice to hold on to those moments is yours, no one else’s.

Categories
music musings

Dreams — Fleetwood Mac

After 23 years of existence, just realized this song and I guess I should be happy I even realized it; better late than never.

Makes me think….how many more am I missing?

Categories
creative work

Short Story: “Friday”

She had ransacked her brain to bits to show up on time for her 8:30am this morning. And even though she was running on no sleep, she had a grin on her face, ready for the day. It was the end of the week; the school-week, the business week, the week of productivity and work, and rest was about to arrive. She had just accomplished her few short term goals last night, and there was no reason for her to feel anything but content. She was ready for the 8 days of freedom and rest that were awaiting her. She wanted to get away from these buildings, its brown walls, the stairs, the chairs, the desks, the books, the people. She wanted a break and that’s what she was getting in just 90 more minutes.

Categories
music musings musings personal confessions

Bloodstream

Wake up and look me in the eyes again
I need to feel your hand upon my face
Words can be like knives
They can cut you open
And then the silence surrounds you
And haunts you

I think I might’ve inhaled you
I can feel you behind my eyes
You’ve gotten into my bloodstream
I can feel you flowing in me

Words can be like knives
They can cut you open
And then the silence surrounds you
And haunts you

I think I might’ve inhaled you
I can feel you behind my eyes
You’ve gotten into my bloodstream
I can feel you flowing in me

The spaces in between
Two minds and all the places they have been
The spaces in between
I try to put my finger on it
I try to put my finger on it

I think I might’ve inhaled you
I can feel you behind my eyes
You’ve gotten into my bloodstream
I can feel you flowing in me

I think I might’ve inhaled you
I can feel you behind my eyes
You’ve gotten into my bloodstream
I can feel you floating in me

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Nowadays, I’ve been living for those few moments of love, passion, & ecstasy—
granted, they are happiness for maybe the short-term, but they feel so amazing.

Sometimes, when we’re going about our day, engrossed in everything we’re supposed to be doing, we easily forget how strongly someone leaves a part of themselves with us. Or rather, how much we leave ourselves with them.

 -n

Categories
Life personal confessions

Waste—

“My parents have since divorced (believe me parents divorcing when you are an adult is no easier than having them divorce when you are a child … especially when there is ‘another woman’ involved. Because you are an adult you are not shielded form any of the sordid little secrets as you would have been if you were a child; you are not protected from the screaming matches or the crying or the utter despair, the hurt and the depression.  You are put in the middle of it all and made to take sides. My little brother was 6 years younger than me. He was protected. It sent me into a deep depression. I just wish my Dad would have had the guts to end it all sooner […]”

It is both heartbreaking and heartwarming to know that most of us, in any corner of the world, go through the same exact thing.

Source

Categories
Life personal confessions

Distracted from Death

I am so devastated. If there’s one thing almost all of us have to deal with our lives at least once in our lives, it’s death. And the worst  part is, no one will teach you enough about it, how to cope with it, how to accept it, and what to make of it — you just have to figure it out all on your own. No matter how many degrees you have, if you’re the CEO of a company, or if you’ve reached the ultimate level of spirituality, there’s something unsettling about coming face to face with our mortality. And wondering what your loved one’s soul is going through over — and over — and over — and over again.

Two months & ten days ago, I lost my uncle. And my cousin, who is nothing less than my sister, lost her father.  I can never imagine how she felt, I may one day, but the fact that someone I love so dearly lost someone who was such a large part of her life, has just broken my heart. Today, I found out my sis-in-law (truthfully my ‘ex’ sis in law)’s mother passed away early this morning. I can’t even fathom what she’s going through right now, I may one day as well, but once again, someone I love so dearly has lost the only person she really had in this isolated world. Even worse, our relationship was so strained the last few months of her life, that I didn’t even have the opportunity to make amends. The most heartbreaking part of all this is that this time last year, we didn’t even think we’d be losing these two people in our lives. I mean, do you ever think that? Why would you even think that?

However, the reason I’m actually writing this right now is because I’ve been walking around, acting, talking, sleeping, laughing like none of these things have happened…I’ve been distracting myself soo well. I guess working 9 hours Monday-Friday helps a lot as well. I’m not too sure if that’s a good thing or a bad thing —I guess writing about it helps when I’m distracting myself in the day-to-day life. But, I do know at the end of the day, that this just sucks. I guess I have not reached the levels of spirituality, reality, acceptance taught by Buddhism, that everything we cherish we will lose….it’s not sad, but it’s the truth, and from knowing the truth, you will grow and move on.

But at 22, this truth really freaking hurts.

Not there yet,

N.